Its All About you

A husband wrote a letter:

"My Dear Wife,

You will surely understand that I have certain needs that your 54 year old body can no longer supply. I am very happy with you and I value you as a good wife. Therefore after reading this letter, I hope that you will not wrongly interpret the fact that I will be spending the evening with
my 18 year old secretary at the Comfort Inn Hotel. Please don't be perturbed - I shall be back home before midnight."

When he came home, he found the following letter on the dining room table:

"My Dear Husband,

I received your letter and thank you for your honesty. I would like to take this opportunity to remind you that you are also 54 years old. At the same time I would like to inform you that while you read this, I will be at the Hotel Fiesta with Michael, my tennis coach who, like your secretary, is also 18 years old. As a successful businessman and with your excellent knowledge of math, you will understand that we are in the same situation,although with one small difference:

18 goes into 54 a lot more times than 54 goes into 18.

Therefore, I will not be back before lunchtime tomorrow."

This young child waited about another minute and repeated, "Mom,
let's run through the rain."

"We'll get soaked if we do," Mom said. "No, we won't, Mom. That's
not what you said this morning," the young girl said as she tugged at
her Mom's arm.

"This morning? When did I say we could run through the rain and not
get wet?" Mom asked.

"Don't you remember? When you were talking to Daddy about his
cancer, you said, 'If God can get us through this, he can get us
through anything!'"

The entire crowd stopped dead silent. I swear you couldn't hear
anything but the rain. We all stood silently. No one came or left
in the next few minutes. Mom paused and thought for a moment about
what she would say.

Now some would laugh it off and scold her for being silly. Some might
even ignore what was said. But this was a moment of affirmation in a
young child's life.

A time when innocent trust can be nurtured so that it will bloom into
faith.

"Honey, you are absolutely right. Let's run through the rain. If
God let's us get wet, well maybe we just needed washing," Mom said.

Then off they ran. We all stood watching, smiling and laughing as
they darted past the cars and yes, through the puddles. They held
their shopping bags over their heads just in case. They got soaked.
But they were followed by a few who screamed and laughed like
children all the way to their cars.

And yes, I did. I ran. I got wet. I needed washing.

Circumstances or people can take away your material possessions, they
can take away your money, and they can take away your health. But no
one can ever take away your precious memories... So, don't forget to
make time and take opportunities to make memories everyday. To
everything there is a season and a time to every purpose under
heaven.

I HOPE YOU STILL TAKE THE TIME TO RUN THROUGH THE RAIN

They say it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to
appreciate them, a day to love them, but then an entire life to
forget them. Send this to the people you'll never forget and
remember to also send it to the person who sent it to you. It's a
short message to let them know that you'll never forget them.

Take the time to live!!!

Keep in touch with your friends, you never know when you'll need each
other -- and don't forget to run in the rain!

Fill this blank with                  Yes or No?

1. __ I don't have a BRAIN.

2. __I dont have SENSE.

3. __I am STUPID

*B* elow are four (4) questions and a bonus question. You have to answer
them instantly. You can't take your time, answer all of them immediately.
OK?

*Let's find out just how clever you really are....*
*

*Ready? GO!!!* *

*First Question:*
*
*You are participating in a race. You overtake the second person. What
position are you in?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Answer: If you answered that you are first, then you are absolutely wrong!
If you overtake the second person, you take his place, so you are second!

Try not to screw up next time. Now answer the second question, but
don'ttake as much time as you took for the first one,
OK?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Second Question:

If you overtake the last person, then you are...?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Answer: If you answered that you are second to last, then you are wrong
again. Tell me, how can you overtake the LAST Person?

You're not very good at this, are you?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Third Question:

Very tricky arithmetic! Note: This must be done in your head only.

Do NOT use paper and pencil or a calculator. Try it.

Take 1000 and add 40 to it.

Now add another 1000 . Now add 30.

Add another 1000. Now add 20. Now add another 1000

Now add 10. What is the total?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Did you get 5000?

The correct answer is actually 4100.

If you don't believe it, check it with a calculator!

Today is definitely not your day, is it?

Maybe you'll get the last question right....

...Maybe.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Fourth Question:

Mary's father has five daughters: 1. Nana, 2. Nene, 3. Nini, 4. Nono. What
is the name of the fifth daughter?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Did you Answer Nunu?

NO! Of course it isn't.

Her name is Mary. Read the question again!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Okay, now the bonus round:

I may have sent this one before. I'm never sure.

A mute person goes into a shop and wants to buy a toothbrush. By imitating
the action of brushing his teeth he successfully expresses himself to the
shopkeeper and the purchase is done.

Next, a blind man comes into the shop who wants to buy a pair of sunglasses;
how does HE indicate what he wants?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He just has to open his mouth and ask...

It's really very simple.... Like you!

There was a millionaire who was bothered by severe eye pain.

He consulted so many physicians and was getting his treatment done. He did not stop consulting galaxy of medical experts; he consumed heavy loads of drugs and underwent hundreds of injections.

But the ache persisted with great vigour than before. At last a monk who was an expert in treating such patients was called for by the millionaire.

The monk understood his problem and said that for sometime he should concentrate only on green colours and not to fall his eyes on any other colours.

The millionaire got together a group of painters and purchased barrels of green color and directed that every object his eye was likely to fall to be painted in green colour just as the monk had directed.

When the monk came to visit him after few days, the millionaire's servants ran with buckets of green paints and poured on him since he was in red dress, lest their master not see any other colour and his eye ache would come back.

Hearing this monk laughed said "If only you had purchased a pair of green spectacles, worth just a few rupees, you could have saved these walls and trees and pots and all other articles and also could have saved a large share of his fortune.

You cannot paint the world green." Let us change our vision and the world will appear accordingly. It is foolish to shape the world, let us shape ourselves first.

Lets change our vision..!!

Appraisal
Resignation

In appraisal meeting they will speak only about your weakness, errors and failures.

In resignation meeting they will speak only about your strengths, past achievements and success.

In appraisal you may need to cry and beg for even 10% hike.

In resignation you can easily demand (or get even without asking) more than 50-60% hike.

During appraisal, they will deny promotion saying you didn't meet the expectation, you don't have leadership qualities, and you had several drawbacks in our objective/goal.

During resignation, they will say you are the core member of team; you are the vision of the company how can you go, you have to take the project in shoulder and lead your juniors to success.

There is 90% chance for not getting any significant incentives after appraisal.

There is 90% chance of getting immediate hike after you put the resignation.

Trainee: "Yes boss enough, now I understood my future."